Belonging

"He's from Newfoundland." By way of excusing my husband for the joke, the expression, the whatever it was that made someones brows furrow in confusion or question.

"Oh, gotcha." Along with an understanding chuckle. As if just his heritage would explain why we don't understand his joke, or what he meant. I suppose it could seem rude, as if it's an insult to be from Newfoundland, but I don't see it that way. I envy the invisible connection that all Newfoundlanders have with one another. That feeling of belonging somewhere, being a part of something. Some might argue that living in Alberta for almost 10 years would give him a bit of a disconnect from that heritage, but in fact, the opposite might be true. He is now joined to thousands of other expats by the bond of having had to leave home. When we run into another Newfoundlander, there is immediately an understanding of at least a small part of the others life, an empathy. Not to mention that when they say, "You're from St. John's? Do you know John?". The answer is "No, but my cousin dated his sister."

I feel a lack of heritage in my life. I wonder if every person growing up in a city would feel the same. There is nothing about Calgary, or Alberta that has shaped me in any way that any other city could have. Sure we have the Stampede, but my roots are Saskatchewan farmers, not cowboys. And the farm stock was so last generation. Our city does nothing to preserve heritage either. Out with the old, in with the new. Buildings are constantly being torn down in favour of something bigger and shinier.

I suppose that if our city did make efforts to preserve it's heritage, that woudn't make a lick of difference to me either. I don't feel particularly tied to this city. We moved here when I was 7, so I can pretty much say that I've been here my whole life, but I still don't get that feeling of heritage. I like it here, probably more than a lot of people who live here. It's close to the mountains, the weather never gets very extreme on either end of the spectrum. It's also a pretty clean city considering its size. I hear a lot of complaints from people about the city that I can't relate to. This city has been good to me and to my family. On that note, I'd move somewhere else in a heartbeat if it benefited my family. I like to think that I'd realize how attached I am to this place, and for what reasons, if I ever left.

I think at heart I'm a small town farm girl. Maybe it's time to buy some land...